The Fish Wrap

Al Quada, Non-partisan in American Election

Al Qaeda is trying its best this Halloween to be non-partisan, according to a recent Reuters report.

“’O God, humiliate Bush and his party, O Lord of the Worlds, degrade and defy him,’ Abu Yahya al-Libi said at the end of sermon marking the Muslim feast of Eid al-Fitr, in a video posted on the Internet.

“Libi, a top al Qaeda commander believed to be living in Afghanistan or Pakistan, called for God's wrath to be brought against Bush equating him with past tyrants in history.”

For months, militants on al Qaeda-linked websites have been debating the significance of Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama or Republican John McCain, but the politically savvy leadership has been careful not to be as partisan as, say, CNN.

Why the reticence?

"To support a particular candidate,” wrote Rita Katz, the director of SITE Intelligent Group, a terrorist monitor, “would debase al-Qaeda's long-standing argument that the United States government is a corrupt institution no matter who is at the helm.”

Apparently, not everyone has been fooled by Sen. Barack Obama’s mantra of hope and change.

The Difference Between Kentucky and California

According to an Associated Press report, two string’em’ups in Lexington Kentucky, “a University of Kentucky student and another man,” were arrested for hanging an effigy of Democrat presidential candidate U.S. Senator Barack Omaba form a tree on campus.

The two --Joe Fischer, 22, a UK student, and Hunter Bush, 21, both of Lexington – “told detectives they decided to hang the effigy after seeing media reports about a Sarah Palin effigy in California.”

The two were repentant; never-the-less they were charged with disorderly conduct related to the hanging of the effigy, as well as burglary and theft for having pilfered the materials used from a frat house.

The two pranksters who hung Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin in effigy from their domicile in California are still on the loose. However, following a discussion with the mayor of West Hollywood, they have agreed to unhang Palin.

The Californians claim their effigy was an exercise in performance art.

Lots of that going around in the art community.

Another artist, the androgynous disco diva Grace Jones, faulted Palin on her sense of humor.

Jones told German magazine TV Spielfilm, “I can't stand Sarah Palin. I bet a woman like that has no sense of humor."

Although Jones had “fallen afoul of feminists for stunts such as appearing naked in a cage,” she manfully insisted she had the right “to determine what was artistic or simply exploitative,” the magazine reported.

"I believe a woman can present herself as a sex object if she has fun doing it," Jones said.

All's well in the world, as long as one preserves one’s sense of humor, but one cannot help but wonder what the sermonizing al-Libi would make of Jones.

Palin's Clothes

This just in: Omaba spent $700,000 for stage lighting in his Berlin appearance. Now, back to Sarah Palin's clothes...

Fear Of Jonging


Erica Jong, author of "Fear of Flying, " is in Italy, pulsing with nervousness.

"My friends Ken Follett and Susan Cheever are extremely worried. Naomi Wolf calls me every day. Yesterday, Jane Fonda sent me an email to tell me that she cried all night and can't cure her ailing back for all the stress that has
reduces her to a bundle of nerves."

"My back is also suffering from spasms, so much so that I had to see an
acupuncturist and get prescriptions for Valium."

"After having stolen the last two elections, the Republican Mafia…"

"If Obama loses it will spark the second American Civil War. Blood will
run in the streets, believe me. And it's not a coincidence that President Bush recalled soldiers from Iraq for Dick Cheney to lead against American citizens in the streets."