Saturday, August 08, 2009

Is Nothing Sacred?

The as yet unnamed 23 year old Greek woman is almost certain to be regarded as a heroine when she returns home to the island of Crete.

Fondled by a drunken Briton who had quite literally let his pants down, the woman poured her drink, a Sabucco, on the offender’s genitals and, when he bounder did not desist, set fire to his manly parts with her cigarette lighter.

The woman immediately turned herself into authorities, while the gent was taken to a hospital.

The TelegraphCoUK has all the salacious details.

‘Police said that the incident took place at a club in the Greek resort town of Malia. The British man, who police have also not yet identified, allegedly took off his pants there and waved his genitals at a number girls. He is then said to have ‘forcefully fondled’ the Greek woman and asked her to hold his genitals.”

The lessons here seem to be obvious: Be polite when drunk; read Euripides’ Medea before going on Greek vacations; and don’t mess with Cretan women.

Non-coincidentally, “Squeaky” Fromme, a consort of mass murderer Charlie Manson (not to be confused with the singer) is set to be released, according to a CNN report.

Ms. Fromme received a life in prison term for attempting to assassinate former President Gerald Ford, perhaps the least offensive American president in the last 50 years.

And, according to a recent Hartford Courant report, the besieged US Sen. Chris Dodd has received a go to heaven pass from a congressional ethics committee.


drgary said...

Did you mean "Euripides' Medea" ? Because I don't think there was much media in ancient Greece.

Don Pesci said...

Thanks drgary. I changed it.