Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Hillary To Klein: Gotta Problem With That?

Here we go again.

A new book by former editor of Newsweek and former editor in chief of the New York Times Magazine Ed Klein, excerpted in Vanity Fair, claims that former President and sexual scofflaw Bill Clinton “seemed to grow even more reckless after his memoir “My Life” became a big bestseller. Thanks to his record shattering $12 million book advance plus another $10 million in speaking fees, he was rolling in money – and hubris.

“Throwing caution to the wind, he started a torrid affair with a stunning divorcee in her early forties, who lived near the Clinton’s in Chappaqua. There was nothing discreet about he way he conducted this illicit relationship; he often spent the night at his lover’s home, while his secret service agents waited in a car parked at the end of the driveway.

“’It’s one thing to go out to California with his wild buddies and stuff there’ said (MY ITALICS) someone with intimate knowledge of the former president’s philandering ‘But being indiscreet with a woman in Chappaqua steps over the line. That’s the place Hillary calls home.’”

I have imprisoned in italics Mr. Klein’s source. Possibly in forty years this “Deep Throat” will out himself, though perhaps Dick Morris, a former Clinton intimate, now a columnist for a reputable publication, will step before the klieg lights and declare he is the person with intimate knowledge of the former president’s philandering immortalized in Mr. Klein’s book.

Morse himself was upended -- and left his position as presidential confidant, pollster-in-chief and advisor -- when a reporter discovered that he had been utilizing the services of sex-provider who specialized in toe sucking or some such thing.

Who spilled the dirt on Morse? Who spilled this most recent dirt on Hillary’s husband?

Who knows? Does anybody care?

Mr. Klein’s publisher no doubt is hoping that everyone will care enough to read Mr. Klein’s book, wherein we discover that Bill Clinton, then touring Bermuda with the future Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, told another nameless source – Or was it the same nameless source? -- “I'm going back to my cottage to rape my wife."

According to “The Truth About Hillary: What She Knew, When She Knew It, And How Far She’ll Go To Become President,” Bill later learned from reading it in a newspaper that his frolic had produced their daughter, Chelsea.

Scandalous enough to sell a biography do you think?

At some point – most likely after Hillary announces her presidential bid, sources tell me – Mrs. Clinton may be asked by some ink stained wretch to comment on the charges made by Mr. Klein.

Before replying – or not – she should read the biographer’s interrogatory with Kathryn Jean Lopez, who interviewed Mr. Klein for National Review Online, part of the vast right wing conspiracy that hopes to consign the Clinton’s to the ash bin of history.

Said Ms. Lopez concerning the “rape claim” in Mr. Klein’s book, “To be upfront here, I thought it was a terrible story to be highlighting, about a child and her parents. Why on earth would you put such a terrible story in your book? — that looks to be flimsily sourced at that. But even if it wasn’t — why tell it?”

Mr. Klein’s answer – that the charge was included in the book as “yet another example of a bizarre political union where a pregnancy is leaked to the largest newspaper in the state and treated as political gain rather than shared privately as a couple” – is not convincing.

Ms. Lopez got it right: The charge was a mean piece of garbage – even if it was true. Though I do not have the advantage of a intimate Clinton source only too happy to bite the hand that feeds it, I suspect that Bill here was joshing at the expense of his sometime demanding wife; you know, the old male Arkansas thing, purposely outrageous, a riff on Hillary’s reputation for frigidity upon discovering the infidelities of her husband … that sort of thing.

I further suspect that Mr. Klein’s unnamed source communicated the nature of the offensive comment to Mr. Klein, but the truth, in his telling of it, never made it past his publisher for reasons having to do with dollars and cents.

I further suspect that no charge relating to the sexual exploits of her husband will have any effect upon the senator’s putative candidacy for the presidency.

By the way, “the stunning divorcee in her early forties” shown in Mr. Klein’s book locking lips with the ex-president is wearing a baseball cap emblazoned “Kerry, Edwards For President.”

Perhaps Mrs. Clinton can induce her to wear a “Hillary 08” cap when next she locks lips with Bill.
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