Friday, March 13, 2009

Auto de Fe Friday: Words We Hope Not To See In The Media Today

Words banned on auto de fe´ Friday, mostly owing to obscene overuse, are:

“Exactly” – usually said to indicate your assent either to an opinion offered by a male pal or a very pretty girl you hope to date.

“Not really” – A supine, cowardly way of saying “f**k off!!!”

“Richard Blumenthal” – Attorney General of Connecticut, voted the worst in his class by the American Competitive Institute, one of the few business groups that Blumie, as he is affectionately known in Connecticut, has not sued. The guy is seriously over exposed.

“Obama” – Enough!

“Can I help you?” – No, you cannot.

“Investment” -- when used as a synonym for taxes. Hey, if I choose not to invest in your failing public school system, your in the tank post office, your latest and greatest program to alleviate suffering, your stop the global warming frenzy, and your Byzantine plot to make the world safe for mortgage defaulters, you’ll cart me off to jail for failing to make "investments" in your madcap social programs, Mr. Government Guy.

This is not investment; it’s a shake-down.
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